Hayden’s back, baby! Woo! I hit the air with a solid fist pump when he showed up at the top of the episode for a (flashback) lightsaber duel with Obi-Wan.[1] Enjoyable, certainly, despite the less-than-fantastic CGI de-aging effects used on both characters. The show’s editing, usually nothing to write home about, really stood out with the way the prequel-era duel was intercut with the “current” action. It was a bit on-the-nose, sure, but worked well as a throughline for the episode, and gave Obi-Wan the chance to be a wily tactician again.[2]

Several scenes in this episode – particularly toward the beginning – demonstrated the limitations of The Volume (that is, the fancy-ass technological monstrosity that’s behind a lot of shots in recent Star Wars content.) I’m not sure whether it was a result of the Styrofoam-ey nature of the cave’s rocks, or the contrast between the crisp white of the stormtrooper uniforms and a somewhat blurry digital background, but something about the opening scenes of the Imperials’ attack on the rebel base just felt…fake.  

On top of that, I found the “big reveal” of Reva’s backstory to be uninspired. It felt like something that everyone in the audience called back in the first episode (to the extent that Reva was a youngling that survived Order 66).[3] The way Obi-Wan manipulated Reva (and her need for revenge against Vader) could be seen as cold-hearted, but I found it clever. I just wish she’d ambushed Vader, oh, I don’t know, in a way that might have actually worked.

That said, the Reva vs. Vader fight was, to use technical terminology, pretty fuckin’ cool. I mean, Vader just dunked on her, over and over again, without ever drawing his own lightsaber – but, at the same time, you got the sense that he had a harder time dealing with Reva than he did beating down Obi-Wan in Part 3 of this same series. The main question this episode left me with – or, rather, the main conclusion – was that everyone in the Star Wars universe has an absolutely massive appendix. Thus, the survival of the Grand Inquisitor, Reva as a youngling, and Reva as an adult. Appendices, y’all. It turns out that, evolutionarily-speaking, they were good for something.[4]

Speaking of being good for something – Loader Bot made an excellent human (robot?) shield for Tala as she readied her Noble Sacrifice™. Rest in peace, Tala (and LB) – we knew you were doomed as soon as you started expositing depressing backstory at Obi-Wan. At least you went out like a badass.

Here’s something not-so-good: my writeups about this show have gotten to the point where I’m going to have to bookmark the thesaurus.com page for “contrived.” The only thing that makes it easier to swallow is that this is Star Wars, which is a franchise primarily aimed at children (and selling them toys). I feel like an asshole when I start chirping about the logistics of a show for kids, you know? Like, sure, it’s important that kids learn about how fast a parsec is. You know where they can learn that shit? Math class.

Still, I feel within my rights to whine a bit about things (like this episode’s getaway-ship-switcheroo) when they blow holes in the plot so big that my suspension of disbelief falls off like the crypto market.[5] Let’s get those complaints out of the way bullet-point style:

• I guess the base’s ventilation system was built by Jawas (or Ugnaughts)? That would explain why it’s too narrow for anyone except mini-Leia to fit into.
• Darth Vader popping a transport open like a tin of sardines? Cool. Darth Vader watching like a dumbass while a second, identical transport takes off right next to it and flies away? Silly. Be better, Darth.
• Did Vader know about Reva’s origins as a vengeful Jedi youngling this whole time? If he did know, and kept her around anyway, either he’s a moron or he has a really fucked-up sense of humor. Maybe a bit of both.
• As much as I love me some Jimmy Smits, I can’t help but be annoyed by Bail Organa’s message for Obi-Wan…like, if you thought the person you sent on a rescue mission got captured, would you send them a video message where you name-dropped (and gave the location of) a kid whose existence you’d sworn to keep secret? Especially when the person you’re sending the message to already knows all this information? When you’d previously agreed to not communicate with each other? I mean, I might do that, but I’m a dumbass, not a Galactic Senator.
• On top of that, how convenient is it that Owen was, like, the only civilian on Tatooine whose name Reva learned? I’ll answer that question: it’s too convenient, and I don’t like it. I assume that she’ll be paying the Lars homestead a visit next week, which sounds cool until you think about it for five seconds and realize that it makes no sense. She already tried to kill Vader! What use is going to Tatooine, even if she does know that Luke and Leia are Vader’s kids (which I don’t think she does)?
• I believe that I used the word “static” last week while describing the direction of the show’s action scenes; unfortunately, the term also applies here, particularly when it comes to the shootouts. The cave battle between the Imperials and rebels was so crammed with lines of bodies (both alive and dead) that I briefly thought I was watching the 501^st Legion gatecrashing a Revolutionary War reenactment. The Reva/Vader and Obi-Wan/Anakin duels were better, but I’m chalking a lot of that up to good choreography, not improved camerawork.
• Absolutely no one in this show has any idea of how to have a surreptitious conversation. Last week we had Tala talking to Obi-Wan via a walkie-talkie while she was sitting in a room full of Imperial officers; this week it’s Reva divulging her backstory to him just a few feet away from a metric fuckload of stormtroopers.

A couple of spare good bits to wrap this up:

• O’Shea Jackson Jr. (who, if you couldn’t tell from the name and physical resemblance, is Ice Cube’s son) continues to please as a sternly realistic – but endearingly helpful – leader of the rebel group that Obi-Wan and Leia have fallen in with.
• It was great to see Haja make a return – and his presence even made sense![6] I can’t remember if I’ve said this before or not, but I’ll say it here: I’m all-in on a comedically-inclined Haja spinoff.
•  I’m glad the Grand Inquisitor is back, mainly so that I can stop losing brain cells worrying about the “integrity of the canon.”
• The episode dedicated some dialogue to explaining why the fuck the rebels didn’t just take Leia and Obi-Wan straight back to Alderaan after rescuing them. Is this a low bar to clear? Yes, very much so, but at least the script put in enough effort to do so.  

Rating: 7/10 (+.25/-1.5)

Adjusted for Sentimentality: 6/10

As you may have noticed, I’m going pretty easy on this series with my ratings (insofar as their position on the spread is concerned). I’m prone to giving passes when I shouldn’t when it comes to issues with media that I’m a preexisting fan of. I know it’s a huge moral failing, and I’m working on it – but in the interim, keep in mind that I’d most likely be giving every one of these episodes a score 1 point lower if they weren’t set in the Star Wars universe. Thanks for being understanding! xoxo

---

[1] I stan Hayden.

[2] And wily Obi-Wan is the best Obi-Wan.

[3] Here’s the question: are we all racist for assuming that the youngling from the beginning was Reva? Because, well, you know. Fuck, I’m going to get run out of town on a rail.

[4] Besides, like, digesting grass.

[5] On an unrelated note, fuck my life.

[6] Given that he was the one who pointed Obi-Wan in this direction in the first place.