Category: Gaming
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Final Fantasy XVI: or, the Saga of Liquid Clive
This isn’t a review. If it was a review, I’d be talking at least some about the things I enjoyed in this game (good music, nice graphics, a solid trio of core characters, expansive and well-presented lore) – but right now I just feel like complaining. It’s easier to be funny when I’m being negative,…
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Interview: Kazuhira “Buster” Johnson, Game Director (Part II)
(If you haven’t read Part 1 of this interview, you can check it out here) Hitler’s hookah is smaller than I’d expected: one would think that the Fuhrer would have relied upon some overwrought device of Volkshalle-ian proportions, but what I’m presented with is almost…dainty. Even though there are no swastikas on the bowl, I…
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I Had ChatGPT Write Apologies From Game Studios
Half-assed apologies from game development studios have become almost par for the course these days – it feels like every other title that gets released comes along with a “We’re Sorry” note (or video) posted by the relevant studio on their twitter account after the negative reviews start to roll in. These digital vomit-pools (the…
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Interview: Kazuhira “Buster” Johnson, Game Director
The trip to Kazuhira Johnson’s compound, located in the scalding wastes of the Nevada desert, is shorter than expected. This is because the driver sent to pick me up, a mute albino the size of one of Shaquille O’Neal’s bigger shits, has a propensity for speeding (in both the vehicular and pharmaceutical senses). We pull…
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Review Showdown: The Callisto Protocol vs. Dead Space (2023)
Introduction: I held off on posting this review until I’d wrapped up both games; it took me a couple of weeks to finish the Dead Space remake, but, with its myriad of fleshy horrors safely in the rearview mirror, here’s a double review no one asked for. Honestly, it’s so one-sided that it isn’t much…
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Bests & Worsts of 2022: Gaming
Well, it’s a new year, which means that everyone is cranking out listicles about what they did and didn’t like over the past twelve months. I’ve tried to put a little spin on things by focusing on game features that I liked (and disliked), as opposed to full titles themselves (although one or two of…
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Review: Splatoon 3 (Nintendo Switch)
I’ve always been partial to team-based multiplayer games that let me contribute in less, shall we say, confrontational ways. Back when I played Overwatch, I enjoyed Lucío’s speed-boosting and healing abilities; in the Battlefield games, I tend to play as a medic, etc., etc. It’s like being the paparazzi on Princess Diana’s commute: sometimes, it’s…
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Review: Deathloop (PS5/Xbox Series S)
I played Deathloop back when it came out on PS5, but its recent release on Game Pass gives me a good opportunity to write a review of the thing while still being somewhat topical. Once more into the breach…shit, wait, wrong time loop game.[1] At the end of the (repeated, over and over again) day,…
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Review: Cyberpunk: Edgerunners (Netflix)
Some Important Context: The entirety of my experience with the Cyberpunk franchise consists of my time with Cyberpunk 2077 and, now, Edgerunners. I haven’t played the tabletop RPG but have heard it’s great; I’ve got a lot of respect for Mike Pondsmith for crafting such an engaging setting. Now, on to our regularly scheduled programming……
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On (the) Campaign: Horizon Forbidden West
Since I last wrote about Horizon Forbidden West,[1] I’ve had the honor of joining the elite club of gamers who have played the game’s story through to its conclusion…even if I did turn the difficulty way the fuck down and then “forget” to adjust it back up. Who cares that I got to the end…