Category: Gaming
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Review: Rollerdrome (PS5)
At the climax of the dystopian 1975 sports film Rollerball, James Caan’s Jonathan E. (yes, that’s actually his name) makes the momentous decision to ignore the wishes of his corporate overlords and spare the opposing team’s last remaining member. Rollerdrome is not like that. Rollerdrome takes the ball from Rollerball and replaces it with the…
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Top Five: Games I Used to Turn My Parents Into Elite Gamers
I’ve spent most of the week helping my folks move out of their old house – so, in honor of that, I thought I’d dust off this article from a while ago that I never got around to posting. 1. Captain Toad: Treasure Tracker After the strokes, my dad didn’t have much going on…
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The Joys of Playing Microsoft Flight Simulator While Drunk
People seemed to like my “LA Noire” piece,[1] so here’s a spiritual sequel. Enjoy (I know my liver didn’t). This article – and the bad decisions detailed herein – arose from a confluence of factors. First was my purchase of an Xbox Series S and subsequent dive into the delights of Game Pass. The second…
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On (the) Campaign – Halo: Combat Evolved
Apologies for the sporadic posting recently; I just moved to a new apartment (well, I moved the couch, TV, and chinchilla, and got the internet set up) so I’ve been unable to surf the zeitgeist as I usually do. I’m hoping to be back on schedule with my posts within a couple of days, but,…
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Review: Demon’s Souls Remake (PS5)
I’m still working on my reactions to the first three episodes of The Boys‘ third season (it’s pretty good), so I thought I’d treat my dedicated readers to some stuff I’d written earlier in the year but hadn’t gotten around to posting yet. You’re welcome. Now, on to the review: They didn’t animate buttholes…
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Review (kind of): Sable
[Played on Xbox Series S.] I really wanted to like this. I did! And I feel bad about the way it ended, like a relationship with a sweet girl who you ultimately just don’t match up that well with, if that girl also asked you to do annoying fetch quests for beetles. But I’m…
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The Joys of Playing LA Noire While Drunk
I have a confession to make: I never finished LA Noire, Rockstar’s 2011 open-world(ish) detect-‘em-up. This places it in an elite category alongside the likes of 2017’s Prey – that is, titles that I feel mildly guilty for not finishing. I can’t recall exactly why I stopped playing Noire in the first place; it might…
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Extremely Late Impressions of the Xbox Series S
Yeah, I know this thing came out in the Bronze Age. I’m a Luddite. Sue me.[1] Long story short, I spent my tax refund on a Series S, which arrived yesterday, within 12 hours of ordering. One-day shipping is nice, but also makes me wince at how hard my grandfather would slap me for being…
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On the Dangers of Over-Iteration in Gaming
Or, why I’m lukewarm on Horizon: Forbidden West. From where I’m sitting (on a well-loved couch way too close to the TV), Guerrilla Games’ releases have fallen into a bit of a pattern over the past 10+ years, alternating between titles that are technically impressive and fun (Killzone 3, Horizon: Zero Dawn) and those that…
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An Ode to Chivalry II’s Commendation Feature
When you die in Chivalry II, several things happen. For one, you are treated to a death animation that almost inevitably resembles a crash test dummy in a dynamite factory. The game naturally informs you who killed you (his name is g00chl0rd69) and how (a battleaxe to the arms, head, and groin). What’s interesting, though,…